Ergh, I'm like never sad :l

I don't know if I'm sad because I'm tired, or sad because I know I'm fucking up every aspect of my life.
But it doesn't feel like I care.
But, you guys, since the whole depression thing, I am NEVER sad.
Like never never ever never.
Sad.
Unless I have a bust up with my boyfriend.
Although he hasn't texted me in a few days.
He's studying, but I've text him :/
Idk if I'm just being paranoid.
I just feel sick like I'm guilty of something.
But I don't know why.
I just want to cry and cut and scream.
I hope I'm just tired.
But I don't think tiredness does all this.
I just need to focus of breaking through this.
And not eating the ice cream in the freezer.
It's calling me.
There's only one more almond one left.
I can do it.
If I wait for my mumma to get it, she won't let me have it.
Come on Mumma!
Peace.